Sometimes God calls us to something new. When this happens, we can respond in all sorts of ways. Often times, our response can include uncertainty, anxiousness, doubt, and even fear. How do we navigate this and try to follow where God is leading us?
I experienced some of these things when I sensed God calling me to church ministry. I had been involved in full-time hospital chaplaincy for about 11 years, and really enjoyed what I was doing and where I was doing it. I saw myself doing this for the long-haul. But towards the end of those 11 years, I began to sense a stirring for the local church like never before.
But why change? Why fix something that isn’t broken? Why change from something that I like so much and is going so well? But the stirring continued and looking back, I think this may have been a sign from God.
One of the passages and stories that was helpful for me during this time, is the story of Jesus and Peter walking on water.
In Matthew 14:27-29, we read of Jesus walking out on the water toward His disciples. When the disciples saw him from the boat, they were terrified and thought it was a ghost. Jesus said to them, “Take courage! It is I. Don’t be afraid.” And Peter responded to Jesus saying, “Lord, if it’s you, tell me to come to you on the water.” Jesus said, “Come,” and Peter got down out of the boat and walked on the water toward Jesus. When Peter saw the wind, he was afraid and began to sink. Now thankfully, it doesn’t stop there. Peter cried out to Jesus and Jesus reached out His hand and caught him.
But let’s slow down and walk through this story a bit. Notice with me the great faith and abandon that Peter had. Doing something, which from a human perspective, shouldn’t work. He puts one leg over, steps out of a boat, and starts to walk on water. Incredible! Imagine seeing this! I get the picture this was going amazingly well until something critical happens. The text says that when Peter saw the wind, he was afraid, and began to sink.
My understanding is that Peter took his eyes off Jesus, and this was what caused him to sink. At the beginning he was focused on Jesus, and this allowed him to see and do what is possible with Jesus. And then his focus went elsewhere; to his surroundings, probably to his logic and humanity. One version reads, “But when he saw the strong wind and the waves…” (Matthew 14:30 NLT). Only when Peter’s eyes left Jesus, did he begin to sink.
We do that, don’t we? We see the wind and the waves around us. We hear things. Suddenly, someone we thought we would be partnering with is out of the picture. Maybe something out of our control happens, that causes funding to disappear. Or maybe a conflict occurs in a relationship and now trust is questioned. Wind and waves swirl around us and grab our attention and focus, making us panic. We begin to worry about what ifs and doubt. And quite naturally, most of us find ourselves questioning: Did I get it wrong? Was my discernment off? Was I following someone or something other than God?
If we learn from Peter’s story, we can see how crucial it is in all of life that we need to focus our eyes on Jesus and keep them there; not on the wind and waves around us or even the ones that are internal in our own being – in our minds or in our insecurity or personal battles.
When I made the transition from chaplaincy to the church, I actually made note of the reasons why I was making this change. I anticipated that when I began to experience difficulty (wind and waves), I would begin questioning myself. What did I do? Why did I leave something that was so good? I kept this list to help remind me of my why.
My wife and kids made me something out of wood that hangs on the wall in my office. It is to remind me of this story from Matthew. It reminds me of Peter stepping out of the boat, with the wind and waves, and the importance of keeping my focusing on Jesus.
How might God be calling you right now? If it is to something new (and even if it’s not), we have the opportunity to learn from Peter and his “all in” faith. We can also learn from his sinking. Let us focus our eyes on the One who walks on water and can even bring us to do the same. Let us not be shackled by fears that swirl around or even inside us. And let us also be comforted in knowing that even when our humanity overrides our faith, and we take our eyes off Jesus, that Jesus is right there to reach out His hand and catch us. Jesus is so good.
Cover photo by Matt Hardy on Unsplash
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